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July 27, 2011 / lynnettedobberpuhl

Maelstrom Drives

Fueled by caffeine and tunes (The Offspring’s Conspiracy of One album) I transform behind the wheel. My inner bad-ass is revealed. Maelstrom, my new alter-ego, is dark of spirit and quick to action; woe betide the wrongdoers caught in our path. Light as a whispered curse we dart down the highway as shadows and clouds are pulled toward us. Vultures circle. Bullies and thieves, hoodlums and malefactors are our prey. You, in the silver Ford Expedition, we have our eye on you. Make no mistake, you will suffer wretchedly should you swerve like that again. Watch it. The miles fly.

Eventually the album ends, my destination nears and I  must reluctantly resume my mild-mannered suburban mom identity. I switch tunes (Blue Man Group, The Complex album, which is still dark and energetic but less…punitive.) I tell myself to settle down as I try to flush the caffeine through my system with water and beef jerky. Four hours is too long on the Midwest highways for me, so I am lucky Maelstrom was around to take a turn at the wheel. Now she sleeps, but miscreants beware, for she shall return.

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3 Comments

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  1. Charmaine / Jul 27 2011 6:57 pm

    I, too, have an alter ego that manages the longer road trips. For me, a longer trip is anything more than 90 minutes, the time it takes to get to the next major city.

    My alter-ego is a more manic persona: crazed laughing, or loud and somewhat off key singing to which ever thumping beat I put into the CD player (RHCP, Foo Fighters, or maybe Offspring if the CD turns up).

    The antics get more exaggerated with the condition of heavy traffic; I seriously dislike heavy traffic like what can be found in those aforementioned major cities.

    I don’t know if Char-maniac is actually helping me survive the drive, or making it worse, I suppose it depends on who else is in the car with me.

    I love Blue Man group.

    Love you cousin

    • lynnettedobberpuhl / Jul 27 2011 7:52 pm

      I am not surprised that we like the same music, we are women of impeccable discernment. And we are both a little crazed (at times.) I am sure that when you let Char-maniac loose, everyone benefits. Hey, you get there, right? Love you too!

  2. Kay Vallery Young / Jul 28 2011 4:11 pm

    Well, I’ve never been crazed (and SOMEtimes I tell the truth)! I liked it the first time I read it. Loved it the second time! It seems your writing gets better by the moment. Next one, please!

    Oh, yes, and I barely recognize Darlington’s story–and I loved it from the beginning! But oh, my, it is infinitely better–who would have thunk it.

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